HOW TO MAKE CHANGE HAPPEN
I wanted to write this post, simply because I want to urge you, dear reader, whoever you are, wherever you are, to do it. And by 'it', I mean whatever it is that scares you. That excites you. That piques your curiosity. That your heart longs for. That you dream about. That you've always wanted to do. That you're afraid of. That you've been meaning to do for some time. That you don't do enough but know you should. Just do it. Don't hold yourself back.
I want to be your biggest fan and supporter, because I know what a difference it can make when someone believes in your capacity to create change. When someone trusts you that much. When someone says without a shadow of a doubt, or a moments pause, 'you can do it'. And I also want you to know that sometimes, you don't even need that person. All you need is that split second of time when your feelings dim and impulses take over, and the stars seem to align in your mind, soul and heart, and suddenly you realise that you can. And so you do.
All you need, is a desire to create change and break out your comfort zone, and a desire to overcome whatever it is that's stopping you from doing that. If you have both these things, no matter how small, then I'm telling you right now that you can do that thing. That thing that I hope these words have already conjured into your mind already.
When I was younger, I used to be complacent. Shy. Timid. Scared. Lacking confidence and self-belief. I never associated myself with qualities like brave. Courageous. Fearless. Reckless. Impulsive. Leader. Resilient. Confident. Even when I felt dissatisfaction, and part of me knew I should and could do something about it, I never acted. Instead I stayed exactly where I was, and allowed myself to become enveloped by feelings that I could actually be doing something about. Feelings that I always had active control over, but instead let control me.
I have never been able to pinpoint when this changed. Instead I believe it happened over time, little by little. I started making decisions that created changes to me and my life, even though I didn't consciously recognise this at the time. And soon the changes started getting bigger, because internally I was getting braver. I was dreaming bigger. I was growing in confidence. I was starting to realise how much potential I always had brewing and bubbling away inside of me.
And once I started to consciously be aware of what I was doing, making these changes became an integral part of my life. And I was always out to better myself. Challenge myself. Push myself one step further. I sought more opportunities. Bigger opportunities. Different opportunities. I started learning how to manage fear as an emotion. It wasn't easy, and even now it gets me. But I've learnt ways to overcome it, embrace it, challenge it, and it normally involves going ahead and doing exactly what it is that I'm afraid of. Biting the bullet, if you will.
And every time I do that, it amazes me that changing my life can be so simple. The action itself is so easy to do. All that build up and fear over something that is over in a second, and simply requires me to say, write, do, make, be something. All those easy, effortless actions we already do a thousand times over every single day of our lives. It makes you realise that the only thing that ever truly stands in our way, is us. We can blame fate, other people, luck, God, co-incidence, things we think are wrong with us. But the fact of the matter, is at the end of the day, everything comes down to us. It's only you, and you alone, that can be the change you wish to see in the world. And sure you may need a helping hand from other people, and all those other forces at large, but ultimately, you are the gravitational pull. You are the beating heart. It's you. It always is.
There is no magic cure or fix. There is no side door to escape through. There is no sneaky deal you can do on the down low. There is no easy route to follow. There is nothing to hide behind. There is no pill or drug you can take. There is no big secret. The simple way to make change happen, is quite literally to do it. Sitting around wondering, dreaming, hoping, wishing, won't change your life. Crying, shouting, hating yourself, and taking out your feelings on others, won't change your life. Merely saying what you want to do, or writing it down, won't change your life. Succumbing to fear every time it strikes, instead of embracing it and mastering it, if only for a second, won't change your life. Listening to people when they tell you that you can't and shouldn't, also won't change your life.
The other day I watched a very inspiring TED video called 'How To Stop Screwing Yourself Over', and one of the key things I took from it, is that we all have ideas, dreams, fantasies of what we would like to do, or would do if we lived in some magical world where xyz wasn't a problem, or didn't exist. We're always reacting in some way to the world around us, generating those ideas, dreams, possibilities, fantasies, opinions. And that makes every single one of us an inventor, a creative, a dreamer, an optimist. We all get these impulses, those surges of electricity after we see, hear, taste, smell, touch something in this magnificent world. And those impulses are our tools to change the world. Our little infinite source of magic.
The key to using these impulses is simple. You just need to follow them through. Marry them with an action in the following 5 seconds, and capture that impulse before it passes you by. In those 5 seconds, you can do 'it', whatever it may be. You just need to write it down, say those words, press that button, do that action. Take a deep breath, feel the crazy surge of adrenaline, impulsivity, madness, and do it. Because in that moment, you hold that magical power to create change, right there in the palm of your hand.
And you don't need to worry about what happens next, because one of the most liberating things I've realised about making change happen, is that whatever the result, it is always, always, always a good thing. Whether it works out as you hoped, or you fail and fall flat on your face, you are a winner every single goddamn time. You are never going to lose. Every time you act on an impulse, and you try to make a change, you either change you, or your life, or both. You make a mistake to learn from. You learn something new about yourself or life. You create a different kind of change. Your dream comes true. You finish what you set out to do. You discover something even better. You become a better version of yourself. Every single time.
It's an incredible thing when you stop to think about it. And the best thing, is that anyone can do it, including you and me. We can always take the driving wheel back from those peculiar fates and forces of life, and decide where we're going to go next. And I'm starting to realise that actually, life is a lot more exciting, meaningful, joyful, fulfilling and magical, when you aren't experiencing it from the passenger seat. So why not be that change you're longing to see in the world? I know you can do it.
