Life After Uni

LIFE AFTER UNI

Believe it or not, dear readers, this is my third time trying to write this post.

The first time, I was feeling a bit sad. I'd just moved back home, and the stark contrast to the life I had literally just been living in the days, weeks before, had hit me all at once. I remember it was a Friday night that it happened, and I had my first big cry, alone in my room, after going out for dinner with my parents. 

I cried like there was no tomorrow. I was devastated. 

So I decided to write about my feelings, and when I went to write this post, my aim was to write about the reality of life after uni, focusing mostly on the not so good things. The things no-one really warns you about when you sign up to the whole uni experience. 

But you know what, I found I couldn't do it, because half way through writing, I realised life after uni wasn't all that bad. There were good things too.

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So the second time I tried to write this post, I was feeling really happy. And I wanted to write how actually, life after uni was pretty good, and how that's another thing people don't really tell you when you sign up to the uni experience either. 

It was the middle of summer. I had lots of plans. Lots to do. People to see. Life to live. Every week, and near enough every day, was filled with something. Lots of distractions to keep me busy, and my mind occupied. It was great. Just like any other uni summer. Long and lazy and lovely. Perfect.

I was so buzzed to write about that side of the coin. All the good things. 

But again, when I was writing, I found that I just couldn't finish the post. I didn't fully believe in what I was writing, because I knew from my previous experience that life after uni isn't always happy and positive either. Sometimes, it's pretty shite too.

So I left it for another few weeks, which brings us to now.

And I've finally realised that the post I want to write for you dear readers, not a negative post, nor is it a positive post. No, the post I want to write, is simply an honest post. The kind of post, I now realise, that you can only really write when you've lived a little. Experienced things a bit more. The post you write with the wisdom of knowing both the positives and the negatives of a situation. 

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Strangely enough, over the last week I've actually been experiencing both those things in parallel. 

My days have been happy, filled, satisfying. No complaints. Yet in the last week, I've cried about my new life three times already, the most recent being this morning. And it's making me realise that this new predicament I've found myself in, is both good and bad. It has its positives, and its negatives. I wouldn't necessarily choose this life for myself, yet at the same time, it's not the worst thing either. It's quite a satisfactory life, but likewise, I know it's not my best life.

Every time I cry, I have to remind myself that it's okay, because effectively I have lost my old life, almost overnight, or at least that's how it feels. And more than that, I've lost a way of life too. At the moment, it's starting to dawn on me that after summer is over, I won't be going back to Manchester again, after four years of that routine. No more studying. No more uni house. No more amazing social life. No more korfball. No more Freshers Week. No more student finance. No more seeing all my friends in one place. No more seeing my boyfriend whenever I want to. And more than that, after 18 years in consecutive education, I won't be starting a new academic year come September. 

This year, there is nothing to distinguish my August and September. There is no-one waiting for me to turn up for class. No more studying or learning or working towards something bigger. I'm all done, and it feels amazing and terrifying at the same time. At the time of writing this post, I don't have anything bigger lined up, and it's strange not knowing what will happen next. Moreover, come September, almost all my friends and loved ones will go back to different places across the country. And this year, I won't be one of them. The solace of at least having my loved ones nearby, or having the time to see me, will go, which is probably the thing I'm struggling with the most right now.

But despite all this, I know in my heart, even in the hardest times, that my new life is still pretty awesome.

I get to see my family a lot more, especially my grandparents, which has been amazing. I have a job, which gives me structure and routine, money (!!!), purpose and where I get to work alongside some really amazing, lovely people. I get to see my friends from home more. I see the countryside and travel to other places a lot more. I have time to chill out and do things I enjoy. I can keep in contact with loved ones by Skype and phone calls, and make trips to go and see them. I feel a lot more relaxed. I have lots of things to look forward to. And of course, I finally get to hold the pen and draw out my life, decide what will happen next, imagine what this next chapter will hold.

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But perhaps more than that, I move into this next chapter with four incredible, magical, cherished, life-changing years behind me. Four years that no-one and nothing can take away from me. Four years that turned my life into something I never believed or dreamt it could be. And I know that's pretty remarkable. Even though my life right now is quite different to what it used to be, I'm very lucky in that some of the best bits of my old life have carried on through.

My friends. My boyfriend. My degree. My love of Korball and Manchester. The experiences and skills and memories that I've gained, too many to name. And the many ways I've changed fundamentally as a person. The Tasha who's landed back in Derby, is very different to the one who left it four years ago to embark on the biggest adventure of her life, and that actually makes me quite proud to say. I carry this beautiful, gorgeous experience within me, and always will, as it's made me the person I am today. The best version of me.

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I'd be lying if I said I'd figured out how to live my best life post-uni, and I'd be lying if I said life after uni was better than uni itself, because it's not right now. One day it will be. But if anything, it feels like someone has taken the snow globe of my life and given it a good old shake, and I'm waiting to see how everything falls into place. Trying to adjust to all the changes. Taking every day, along with all the happiness and the hiccups, as it comes. All of which I'm realising is ok.

I don't have all the answers, and I know this journey is still in its beginnings. Who knows that the future looks like.

But in the last three months, I have learnt to cherish what I had, see the positives in what I have now, be kind to myself, and look forward to what comes next (whatever that may be), and I don't know about you, but I think that's a pretty good start.

Here's to the future.

The Other Side of Parkinson's Disease

THE OTHER SIDE OF PARKINSON'S DISEASE

I've been wanting to write this post for quite some time now, but every time I sit down to write it I can never quite find the words to capture what it is I want to say. It never quite turns out right.It feels like I have so much I want to share, and there's this burning desire to offload and brain dump, yet at the same time, I'm not quite sure what my point is.

Last November, my Dad was officially diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease. Parkinson's is a degenerative disorder that is caused by your brain losing its ability to produce dopamine, an important neurotransmitter that we need to help us move properly. When 80% of dopamine is lost, the classic symptoms of Parkinson's occur: tremor, slow movement, rigidity, stiffness. 

Initially, these symptoms aren't too bad, and you can lead a relatively normal life. However over time, as more dopamine is lost, your ability to do everyday movements, including eating, swallowing, laughing, communicating, walking, breathing, is compromised. This means that, despite the progression of Parkinson's being similar to that of the ageing process, in that it happens gradually, an individual's quality of life and ability to function decreases more more quickly and much more severely. 

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I first learnt about Parkinson's a couple of years ago, as part of my degree course. I'm training to be a Speech and Language Therapist, and people with Parkison's are one of the many client groups that a therapist sees. It's strange to think that back then, Parkinson's was just another thing to treat, another lecture to sit through, another assignment to complete. It felt so impersonal and unrelated to me. The only time I ever thought I'd encounter it again, is if I ended up working with adults who've acquired communication disorders. 

Yet one year later, I'm on my 3rd year placement, and my Dad sends me a text saying the neurologist (who he happened to be seeing at the time) thinks he has Parkinson's Disease. And my world is momentarily turned upside down, and the irony of the situation engulfs me. Suddenly, my life has been taken over by this disease. Suddenly, it has latched itself onto me and my family, our lives, our futures. Suddenly, it has become ours. Suddenly, it has re-aligned the stars, re-written the next chapters of our lives, and changed everything we ever knew, and thought to be real, constant, forever. 

It was so disorientating.

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For me, it was so weird to be on the other side of the diagnosis. I didn't realise, until that point, what's it like to find out news like that. How it feels. How it hurts. How it affects not only you, but the lives of everyone around you, like some seismic wave cascading out beneath your feet. In our family, probably because of my degree, I was the first one to crack. The thing that really got me, was the realisation, the fact, that one day, my Dad was going to die. Growing up, you know your parents aren't going to be around forever, but you almost live as though that's the case. Yet until that day, I had never considered the thought that one day, my parents will die. It will happen.

And suddenly, it felt like it was written in stone.

Worse still, I didn't know how much time we would have left. Parkinson's is so individualised, so person-specific, and it's impossible to predict how many precious years you have. Back then, and even now, I sometimes find myself wondering if my Dad will be around to watch me and my sister get married, have kids, settle down, live our lives. And if he is still here, what will he be like? Will he able to talk? Hug us?  Walk? There's all these unknowns and what-ifs. 

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Over the last 18 months, I've already seen my grandparents start to outdo my Dad. Even though they're older, they can do more than he can, which is strange to comprehend. I've had to tie his shoes for him. Help him cut his dinner and do his shirt up. And I've seen him having to use the other side of his body to compensate for the hand that can't use a mouse properly anymore, and the leg which drags when he walks. Every time I see him, I wonder what will have changed next.

I've seen my Mum have a mini-meltdown. I've seen my sister cry. I've seen it affect everyone in different yet similar ways, as we all try to process and look ahead. I still cry about it every now and then. There's no lying, it hasn't been easy. 

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But I suppose the main reason I wanted to write this post, is that, despite all that, there have been a lot of positives. As John Green demonstrated so well, in his novel 'The Fault In Our Stars', there is another side to disease, which isn't often spoken about or recognised. And that's the main thing I want to share with you guys.

Yes, I hate not knowing how many years I have left with my Dad. Yes, I hate not knowing how this disease will affect him, and worrying if he can still be the man we all know and love. Yes, I hate seeing my family worry, and get upset. Yes, I hate that my future has also been coloured by this disease, and that it has dictated all our futures, taken the control and choice right out of our hands. Sometimes, I really bloody hate Parkinson's Disease.

And yet... and yet sometimes, I find myself wondering if it was one of the best things that could have happened to us. 

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For starters, Parkinson's Disease is funny. The movement my Dad's hand constantly makes has created some very funny memories and situations, not least because it resembles the same action a man uses to pleasure himself. And his attempt at dancing at Christmas really was a sight for sore eyes. Better yet, there was the first time the Parkinson's nurse called, and my Dad answered in a very camp voice, pretending to be a personal assistant, and 'could he take a message' to pass on to my Dad. That really set the tone for all future encounters with the Parkinson's support team.  

Another thing Parkinson's has done, is brought my family closer together. We appreciate each other more. We're more unified. We say yes. We laugh more. We do things together. We show our love. And my Mum and Dad are quite literally living life to the full now, whilst they have the freedom and the means to do so. 

And for that I'm so grateful, because I know that whatever happens, we will be able to look back on these years, knowing that we made the most of them, and that we loved and appreciated and held onto one another whilst we still had the chance. That we made the memories. Shared those moments. And recognised and valued them as they happened.

Which leads me onto another thing Parkinson's has taught me: how to live in the present. With a degenerative disease, the future is up in the air. There's no certainty anymore. It's all out of your control. However one thing you always know, is that, because of the nature of the disease, today is always going to be better than tomorrow. Today is always your best day. The present will always surpass and outweigh the future. Things will never be this good again. So you need to live in the moment, and enjoy every minute of it. Be present, be grateful, be a part of it. 

And another thing, is that it really does make you see the bigger picture. As someone who focuses too much on the details, and often becomes absorbs in that quest for perfection and being good enough, I'm usually blinded to the bigger picture. I find it hard to step away and gain that perspective. So in many ways, I'm very grateful to Parkinson's Disease for helping me to overcome that, and realise that there is more to life than whatever silly thing it is I'm worrying about that day. There's more important things. There's more out there. I understand what really matters most now. And to have that insight and understanding at 21 years old is something I feel incredibly lucky to have.

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So I guess, to summarise, 

1) Parkinson's Disease is a bit shit really

2) It's not always easy

but 3) Surprisingly, there's also so many good things about it. And they're the things that make me feel positive about whatever happens next, and so lucky that as a family, we've had the kick up the bum we needed to realise that we need to appreciate and love each other now, while we have the chance. 

and 4) I really love my Dad, silly goofball that he is. 

To find out more, visit: https://www.parkinsons.org.uk

Luck

LUCK

The other week, I bought my best friend a £20 gift card and sent it over for her 21st birthday. I wanted her to treat herself something special. My intent was to then take her out for dinner, cocktails, and give her opportunity to wear her new purchase. I was so excited to treat my friend, and celebrate her special birthday. But a few days later I found out that someone had opened the birthday card I'd sent her and taken the gift card. 

It really upset me at the time, partially because my period is due soon and it makes my hormones & emotions go a bit doo-laly, but also because I'm someone who intrinsically tries to believe in the goodness of people. I want to believe that people will do the right thing. I want to believe in someone's ability to be a decent human being. I want to give people a chance, the benefit of the doubt, before I judge and categorise them. But then something like that happens, and it's a harsh truth. A reminder that there are people out there who will do the wrong thing, against their better judgement. And that realisation hit me so strongly because I don't want to believe that people are bad. It's hard enough to hold on to your hope in people, as you get older and life gets harsher... 

And I guess for me, it was knowing that someone had deliberately opened my card, seen the pictures I'd lovingly included, the heartfelt letter, all those references to my friend's 21st birthday, and taken the gift card despite all that. As though it was theirs to take. I just couldn't believe someone would do that. Where is their consciousness, humanity, empathy? The blow was made worse because a few days earlier I discovered that my beloved camera of 8 years was broken, and hormonal Tasha thought this was the worst thing in the world ever. Just as she thought someone breaking into someone else's mail was the worst thing in the world ever. I guess you could say I was feeling a bit sorry for myself.

But later on, when I'd regained my emotional composure and rationality, I began to think things through again, but from a different perspective. I began to think about the person who had taken the gift card, and how I had judged them, been angry at them, thought ill of them. Now I'm not condemning stealing here, but as I was thinking, I wondered who this person might be. I didn't know enough to judge them for their actions. What might have driven them to steal the giftcard? What were their circumstances? What was their story? Maybe they wanted to treat a loved one. Maybe they rarely had the chance or money to buy themselves new clothes or treat themselves. Maybe they'd seen a really nice dress or top in that store and thought f**k it, I need that dress/ top/ etc, I'm taking this bloody gift card. Maybe it's their favourite store too. 

I don't know.

What I did know, however, was that holding onto the anger wasn't doing me any good. As my Mum put it bluntly on the phone, there was nothing I could do about it now. It had happened. A lesson had been learnt. Time to move on. So that's what I did. I thought of it as becoming a random act of kindness, and I hoped that the person would enjoy the gift card and buy something really nice. I also hoped that karma would work a little bit of magic. And anyhow, I knew I'd make the money back at work soon enough and be able to treat my friend again. And we're in a fortunate position to be able to treat each other to things like gift cards, meals, cocktails... Same with the camera. It was sad and annoying, but it wasn't the end of the world. My camera was old, I needed another one soon enough. And I've been lucky enough to have a camera, and to have had it alongside me for all these years. No point holding onto the negativity for any longer than I had too.

And after all this, I started thinking about the idea of luck. After my brushes with bad luck, I slipped into that 'woe is me' mindset rather quickly. Yet after a bit of sulky brooding, I thought about the good luck I've had recently. Apart from a few slip ups and iffy moments here and there, things haven't been too bad this year, and some really great things have happened to me, for which I am grateful. So I thought to myself, it's probably about time that I had my fair share of bad luck. 

And I thought back to last year, and the brushes I had with bad luck then and I knew that although they weren't great for various reasons (eg. having work colleagues walk in on me having a poo, does it really get better than that?), but they didn't go on to define my year. I refused to let them. If anything, I'm glad they happened because they humbled me, realigned me, strengthened me, and allowed me to fully appreciate the good things in my life. Oh, and remember to actually lock the toilet door too. 

So I guess what I'm trying to say, is that bad luck happens to all of us. Every year, even in the best of years, we get bad moments, bad days, bad weeks, bad luck, make bad decisions. Whether it's within our control or not, what we can always guarantee, is that year after year, a big dollop of shite is going to land slap bang on our plate. That's the way it is. Luck is temperamental and elusive and a cheeky little madam. And I guess we just have to accept that and make peace with that. Besides, the magical tool we always have on our side, is how we deal with the bad luck when it happens. Kicking up a fuss, blasting out negativity, drowning and stagnating in self pity, well it won't get you anywhere really. You might even end up in a worse position. 

So see the positive side: What did that piece of bad luck teach you in the right here & now. What is it teaching you in the long run. What is going well in your life. What good luck have you experienced so far. What have you got be thankful for. Where does this fit into the grand scheme of things. What can you do to learn from the experience. What can you do to tweak the outcome into a positive, instead of a negative. 

The solutions aren't always obvious, and it's ok to brood for a little while and cry into your cup of tea and flop on something dramatically ad eat 5 consecutive packets of hobnobs. Just make sure you get back up on your high horse cowboy and carry on going. 

How To Revise Somewhat Successfully

HOW TO REVISE SOMEWHAT SUCCESSFULLY

It's that time of year again, dear readers. Exams. Oh the joys. Oh the wonder. Oh how I do love spending endless days revising when I could be out actually living my life. But lo and behold, it is something we must do in order to keep moving forward in our lives. And although revision is a complete pain in the rear end, it isn't that bad, when you think about it. For starters, its entire existence is dedicated to helping you learn new information, most of which will help you better your life in some shape or form. It also gives your brain a good workout too. Plus its a reason to slob in your pjs all day and raid all the junk food in the house, because that brain of yours is one heck of a powerhouse, and it needs all the energy it can get.

If I'm still not selling it to you, don't worry. I don't think revision has ever made anyone jump for joy, in the whole existence of this universe and mankind. Lets face it, revision is one almighty, problematic drag. It also feels like a great injustice too, especially at Christmas time. When you've spent 12 odd weeks away from home, it's mindboggling why lecturers think you'd rather be revising models of sentence comprehension deficits, instead of spending time with the people you love. What's more, there's lots of different information to go over, condense and remember in a relatively short space of time. You have to figure out how to actually use the information in an exam, in order to pass the damn thing. You have to figure out where you're going to revise, how you're going to revise, when you're going to revise. Do you go the library, or stay at home? Do you start light years before, or do you cram it all in the night before? Do you go down the obsessive highlighting route? Do you make a revision timetable? SO MANY QUESTIONS.

Now I understand this post has not come at the most convenient time. I don't know about you, but my last exam is tomorrow (bar a lovely video exam next week, yay!), so I've definitely missed the bandwagon this time round. But I thought I'd share my tips anyway because they may still be of some use, and hopefully of more use next exam season (does the joy ever stop?!). They're usually somewhat successful for me, and its what I've found works, having spent the last five years of my life doing exams (yes I feel sorry for me too). So I hope something I write helps you out in some way, and I wish you all the luck in the world with whatever exam-related event you have to endure.

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TOP TIPS 

001. I know it's a drag, and yes I know that like me, you'd rather be watching Keeping Up With The Kardashians, but do the extra reading as you go along, and make notes of the potentially useful things you come across. That way you don't have to do it all later, and it normally helps you understand things better too.

002. Find out as soon as possible when your exams are, as it will help you prioritise what to revise, and give you an idea of when to start revising.

003. When it comes to making a start, chose a module and aim to go over a couple of lectures a day (aka. break it down to avoid having a Vesuvius-like brain explosion). 

004. I get a piece of paper, either A4 or A5, and I pick out the key things from each lecture/ extra reading, or summarise key things as briefly as possible, and then I write them all down on to a piece of paper or two. Nice and concise. It's a way of condensing the workload into something manageable, and pinpointing the most important information to take away from that particular lecture. 

When it comes to deciding what's important, I tend to follow the lecture headings or the ideas that seem worthwhile remembering. Condensing also makes revising easier, as you can easily take your notes with you anywhere. Literally, anywhere.

005. I try and do the above 3-4 weeks before the exam. I know it sounds nerdy, and not a lot of fun, but it means that 1) I have my resources ready to use nearer the time, and 2) it gets me subconsciously thinking about things, and remembering what I actually spent the last however many weeks of uni learning.

006. Google or YouTube anything that doesn't make sense, and try and find the simplest, clearest explanation online so that you've got it straight in your head first. Think of it as a platform you can then build on.

007. If you have to learn references for your exam, don't fret. Learn the names alongside the key fact/ idea, eg. Eggman (2013)- fried eggs are superior to boiled eggs, so that you learn to associate the two together. 

008. When deciding where to revise, I personally like to do a mixture so that things don't get boring. Sometimes I go to the uni library or the library in town, so that I actually get out the house and feel like there's some purpose to my day. Sometimes I stay in my room in my pjs and dressing gown. Judge it by how you feel when you wake up in the morning.

009. When trying to organise my time, I like to 1) write a list somewhere with my exams, dates & tick boxes, so I can visually see that I'm making progress, and 2) write a list each day of the things I want to do, and again put tick boxes so you can see what you've done, what needs doing, and relax when you've done.

010. Take breaks regularly, and use those procrastination activities as motivation. E.g, telling yourself you can go eat a whole packet of biscuits/ make a cup of tea/ check social media/ reapply your make-up/ chat to your friend/ like funny garlic bread memes/ find world peace, once you've done xyz. 

011. If your lecturer sets you questions, holds a revision session, puts intended learning outcomes on lecture slides, says you should revise certain things, follow their advice like its the word of God.

012. I sometimes make little info sheets or posters of info, as another way of condensing info down further. You can see how things link together better, and it's also a great opportunity to do some excessive highlighting.

013. Spend time just looking at your revision resources. Look at what pieces of information are where and what comes before/ after them, how you've arranged the information on the page, colours and words, used. I don't know if I have photographic memory or what, or if everybody can do this, but I find that by doing this, in an exam I can usually remember the resource in my head, and almost read it in my mind, which is pretty useful when I forget things. 

014. Use funny links to help remember things. For example, in my exam the other day, one of my references was 'Arehole', so naturally I thought of 'arsehole'. Therefore, when it came to using the reference in my exam, I thought of the idea, which reminded me of arsehole, then Arehole, and bam, I had my reference.

015. Like the last point, link information together, as when you're trying to remember things long-term, your ability to retrieve the information depends on how you encoded it. So like the previous example, I linked Arehole to the key idea, the word arsehole, the year 2009, where I was when I learn that bit of information, the format that the information came in (powerpoint in this case), how it linked to the subject matter and other pieces of information, etc. Lots and lots of links, so when I needed the information in the exam, I had lots of potential routes to help me get to that lil nugget of knowledge.

016. Personally I like to recite information out loud, in my head or under my breath, depending on whose around me. I look at the piece of paper and focus on a particular fact, then I look away and try and remember it. I keep doing this till I can remember the fact in my head clearly, then I repeat it a few times over. Some time later, I'll then question myself on it, and if I can't recall it, I go back and repeat the same process. I find this works really, really well for me.

017. Do a little bit every day, just to keep the juices flowing. You'll find that you'll gradually need to spend less and less time. 

018. Sleep lots during revision, because that's what your brain needs to consolidate information. See, there are some perks to revision.

019. A couple of days before the exam, just flick through the lecture slides again to make sure you haven't missed anything. If you have, the fact you've got most of the core stuff already down, means it's a lot easier to remember new things.

020. Eat everything you can possibly put in your mouth, cos that energy is going to make your brain one happy bunny.

How To Cope With Uni

HOW TO COPE WITH UNI

The other day, I happened to read an article that highlighted how students are more likely to develop depression, anxiety and heightened stress during their time spent at university. Due to numerous pressures including exams, dissertations, assignments, social life, love life, extra curriculars, family, money, -insert anything you could possibly think of in the whole wide world-, the likelihood of experiencing a meltdown akin to an erupting Mount Vesuvius is sky high, and unsurprisingly so too. And I think the worst thing of all, is that you're completely and utterly unprepared for it when it happens. Whether you're coming into uni straight from college, after a gap year, or entering as a mature student, the one thing no-one ever seems to tell you about uni is that it is hard, with a capital H A R and D. You hear about how it will be the best time of your life, how you will make so many friends, how awesome it is moving to a new city, being independent, living in a house, how much fun the societies and nights out and house parties and socials are, how student loan is like a triple kiss from God and how you will go straight into employment with your 1st class honours degree because you're such a clever clogs and all round super crazy amazing person. And yes, all those things are likely to happen and you really will have such a ball, but the degree itself, the one thing people always forget to mention, is often one of the most difficult things you will ever do. And that in turn, means that things are not always hunky dory, and the most important thing to remember is that that is okay.

Now that I've begun my third year of madness, and my poor brain tries to figure out just how I'm going to survive yet another year, and comprehend how I even made it this far in the first place, I thought it would be a good idea to talk about the overall uni experience, warts and all. Share some of my own advice regarding how to cope with it, so that we can all save that Vesuvius eruption for another day. I think one of the most important things to recognise about uni, is that it is very much a mixture of the good, the bad and the ugly. When you first start, particularly if you've moved away from home or you're having to travel to the moon and back just to make it into uni every morning, the first thing you realise is that your life is essentially thrown up in arms. It's like uni blows a whirlwind your way, and suddenly everything you ever knew is up in the air, and it takes a while for it all to settle back down again and for some kind of normality to resume. You need to make friends with all these strangers. You need to figure out how to get around campus. You need to work out how to use your student card and how to even get into the library, let alone take out a book. You need to get used to living in your new home, get used to your new city, get used to not living with the people you love and know best. You need to start looking into those extra curriculars to pimp your CV. You need to learn how lectures work, how to use the online learning platforms, how to write uni standard essays. You need to get your head around referencing, the actual stuff you've come here to learn, and the fact that journals are no longer diaries featuring word vom about all the boys you're crushing on. 

It's a lot to stomach in one go, and even when you finally get the knack of it all, which may be half way through first year, or half way through second year if you're me, it still doesn't really get easier. Just when you find your footing, the content gets harder and the demands placed upon you increase. And alongside that you have grown up problems to deal with too, like shooing out rogue slugs in the downstairs bedroom, berating the local council for sending you a tax bill, stressing if you have enough money to pay your rent, a fridge that thinks it's a freezer, talking to the police about a car that got smashed by burglars the other night, and regretting the alcohol and cheese toastie induced messages you sent at 4 in the morning to that guy you like. And you sometimes find yourself wondering if you should just quit while you're ahead and pursue a career as a toilet paper distributor in a local nightclub instead. You wonder if all this is really worth it at the end of the day. You wonder if this is what you really want. Who needs that naff graduation picture hanging in the downstairs toilet anyway, right? You question if you're actually clever enough for this uni malarky, and if the fact you made it to third year is just sheer luck. You look at everyone else and wonder how they have it so easy, how they haven't exploded yet, how they're managing to maintain their social life and relationships and cracking fashion sense and all round sanity. It's like the uni gods tapped everyone with the magic wand of success and good fortune, but then they got swayed by the £1 pizza deal at Domino's and they forget to send some magic your way too. That's what it can feel like sometimes, but the important thing is that it isn't like that all the time. 

Although university may be hard, and the degree itself will push you to your limit and then some, and you may have the occasional freak out or melt down, and things may not always go your way, all this is just one side of the story. The other side, as it turns out, is actually pretty okay. There's all the fun, wonderful, joyful, special, unforgettable, crazy moments that help make everything feel worthwhile. Motivate you to keep on going. Make you feel happy and proud and content. The obstacles you overcome. The successes you earn. The battles you face. The people you meet. The experiences you collect. The way you move closer to your end goal every single day. There's a reason why people are so eager to go to uni in the first place, and there's a reason why the majority make it out at the other end in one piece, clutching their degree certificate and and happy dancing their way on to the podium.

So until that day comes (which it will), what can we do to make it easier for ourselves? How we can survive the ups and downs, and make it to the end of our degree in one piece? How can we cope with everything? How do we keep the juggling act afloat and in motion? Is it even possible? If I'm being honest, I don't think there's ever a perfect answer to these kinds of questions, and naturally as I've only just begun 3rd year (even though I feel like I've been at uni for a million trillion years), I don't quite have all the answers either. But I have experienced enough to know what works, what doesn't work, what's okay, what's not okay, and how to get through the more trying times and get the most out of the whole uni experience. So I think that's a pretty good start. And if even one of my tips helps you, even just a smidge, then it's so absolutely worth it.

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MY TOP TIPS

001. Laugh
 LAUGH LOTS. LAUGH WHEN YOU MAKE A TIT OF YOURSELF. LAUGH WHEN SOMEONE MAKES A TIT OF THEMSELVES. LAUGH WHEN THINGS GO TITS UP. LAUGH OVER SILLY, WONDERFUL, STUPID THINGS. LAUGH AT FUNNY WORDS. LAUGH WHEN YOU HEAR SOMETHING RIDICULOUS. LAUGHING SOLVES A MULTITUDE OF PROBLEMS.

002. Keep Up

TRY AND DO YOUR NOTES AND ESSENTIAL/ RECOMMENDED READING ON THE SAME DAY AS THE LECTURE (ie. do it as you go along instead of letting it all pile up and subsequently having a cataclysmic meltdown).

003. Talking to non-uni people

REGULARLY TALK TO PEOPLE YOU KNOW WHO AREN'T AT UNI, SUCH AS FAMILY MEMBERS, FRIENDS, PARTNERS ETC. THEY'LL MAKE YOU REALISE THAT THERE'S A WHOLE WORLD OUTSIDE OF UNI, & THAT THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN UNI TOO (basically help you regain your perspective).

004. Talking to uni people

REGULARLY TALK TO PEOPLE WHO AREN'T ON YOUR COURSE. IT WILL MAKE YOU REALISE THAT OTHER PEOPLE HAVE IT TOUGH TOO, AND THAT YOU ARE NOT ALONE. IT ALSO HELPS YOU PUT YOUR OWN PROBLEMS AND STRESSES ASIDE, IF ONLY FOR A LITTLE WHILE.

005. Use the printer

PRINT OFF THINGS FROM LECTURES, INSTEAD OF WRITING EVERY SINGLE THING= SAVES A LOT OF TIME & STRESS

006. Academic Adviser

MAKE REGULAR APPOINTMENTS WITH YOUR ACADEMIC ADVISER. IT HELPS TO KNOW THAT THERE'S SOMEONE THERE YOU CAN TALK TO AND WHO CAN SUPPORT YOU. 

007. Bug Lecturers

EMAIL LECTURERS IF YOU HAVE QUESTIONS, UNCERTAINTIES OR WORRIES THAT ARE BUGGING YOU, EVEN IF YOU THINK THAT DOING SO WILL MAKE YOU LOOK STUPID OR WEAK OR ANNOYING. THEY GET PAID TO HELP YOU & THEY WANT TO HELP YOU & SEE YOU SUCCEED, SO MAKE THE MOST OF THEM.

008. Exercise 

DO EXERCISE, EVEN IF IT'S JUST WALKING TO AND FROM UNI. IT CAN HELP TO COUNTERBALANCE THE MENTAL & EMOTIONAL DEMANDS WITH PHYSICAL DEMANDS, AND NOT ONLY DOES IT HELP PROVIDE A HEALTHY EMOTIONAL OUTLET, IT ALSO HELPS YOU KEEP FIT.

009. Word Vomit

WRITE DOWN ALL THOUGHTS ON YOUR HEAD ONTO A PIECE OF PAPER. EVEN IF IT'S UNINTELLIGIBLE, THE MERE ACT OF WORD VOMITING YOUR THOUGHTS & CLEARING OUT YOUR MIND DOES ABSOLUTE WONDERS.

010. To-do lists

MAKE LOTS OF TO-DO LISTS, THEY'RE VERY USEFUL, EG: WHAT YOU'RE DOING EACH DAY & WHEN, RANDOM ODD BITS YOU NEED TO DO, THINGS YOU NEED TO BUY, ASSIGNMENTS/ ASSESSMENTS/ EXAMS THIS SEMESTER, THINGS YOU NEED TO DO FOR UNI THIS WEEK, UNI WORK YOU WANT TO GET DONE TODAY. IT HELPS FOCUS YOUR ENERGIES IN THE RIGHT PLACES, HELPS YOU PLAN YOUR DAY, HELPS MOTIVATE YOU BECAUSE YOU CAN SEE WHAT YOU'VE ALREADY ACHIEVED, AND IT HELPS YOU KNOW WHEN TO CALL IT QUITS & JUST RELAX.

011. Relax

ALWAYS MAKE SURE YOU SCHEDULE IN RELAXATION TIME EACH DAY, EVEN IF IT'S JUST AN HOUR. AS UNI GETS HARDER, IT'S EASY TO DISREGARD RELAXATION AS BEING A WASTE OF VALUABLE TIME. THIS IS NOT TRUE. IF ANYTHING, RELAXATION BECOMES EVEN MORE CRUCIAL, ESPECIALLY FOR YOUR HEALTH AND WELLBEING. WHEN YOU'RE RELAXING, DO SIMPLE, EASY & FULFILLING ACTIVITIES SUCH AS WATCHING A TV SHOW, BAKING, SLEEPING, SHOPPING, DRAWING, PLAYING MUSIC, SINGING, PHOTOGRAPHY, GOING FOR A WALK. 

012. Deep Breaths

ANY TIME YOU FEEL THE PANIC AND ANXIETY AND FEAR RISE, STOP. TAKE A NICE, LONG, DEEP BREATH. CLOSE YOUR EYES FOR A MOMENT. CLEAR YOUR MIND. FEEL THE AIR FILL YOUR BODY. AND WHEN YOU WAKE UP FROM THE MOMENT, TELL YOURSELF THAT EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OKAY, BECAUSE IT WILL BE. 

013. Keep Up

KEEP UP WITH THE THINGS THAT YOU ENJOY AND THAT MAKE YOU HAPPY, EVEN IF IT'S HARDER TO DO SO- DON'T LET UNI TAKE OVER YOUR LIFE OR GET IN THE WAY. IT WILL HELP YOU TO FEEL FULFILLED AND SANE AND LIKE YOU'RE YOU AGAIN. 

014. Time Out

IF YOU'RE IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIG WORKLOAD AND IT FEELS LIKE YOUR BRAIN AND BODY ARE GIVING UP ON YOU, TAKE A BREAK. STOP WHAT YOU'RE DOING. GO FOR A WALK. GET A DRINK. LISTEN TO SOME MUSIC. TALK TO SOMEONE. MAKE SOME FOOD. GO OUTSIDE. LEAVE IT AND COME BACK TO IT LATER. EITHER WAY, JUST GIVE YOURSELF CHANCE TO BREATHE AND RELAX AND REFOCUS AND RECHARGE THE OL' BATTERIES. IT HONESTLY MAKES SUCH A MASSIVE, NOTICEABLE DIFFERENCE.

015. Think Back (Get Some Perspective)

WHEN EVERYTHING FEELS TOO OVERWHELMING AND ALL CONSUMING, THINK BACK TO TIMES IN YOUR LIFE WHEN THINGS WEREN'T THIS WAY. HAPPY MEMORIES. HAPPY TIMES. GOOD THINGS. THINK BACK TO PREVIOUS DIFFICULTIES YOU FACED, AND REMEMBER HOW YOU OVERCAME THEM. REMEMBER HOW FAR YOU'VE ALREADY COME AND HOW HARD YOU'VE ALREADY WORKED TO GET TO THIS POINT, AND REMIND YOURSELF THAT YOU DESERVE TO BE HERE AND THAT YOU ARE MORE THAN CAPABLE OF PASSING YOU WILL PASS THIS BLOODY DEGREE. THESE TIMES WILL PASS, AND YOU WILL GET THROUGH THEM, AND YOU WILL HAVE YOUR PICTURE WITH THAT STUPID MOTORBOARD AND SCROLL.

016. Don't stress about getting the top grades

TO PASS UNI IS A MIRACLE IN ITSELF, BECAUSE SURPRISE SURPRISE, UNI IS HARD. SO ALL YOU CAN REALLY DO IS JUST TRY YOUR BEST, AND IF YOU PASS, THEN WELL DONE YOU, YOU CLEVER CLOGS. IF YOU GET A HIGH GRADE, WELL LET'S CRACK OPEN THE PROSECCO AND PARTAY, AND IF YOU DON'T PASS, DON'T GIVE UP OR TURN ON YOURSELF. WE ALL HAVE OUR OWN STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES. THE IMPORTANT THING IS THAT YOU TRY AGAIN, TURN THAT WEAKNESS INTO A STRENGTH, SEEK HELP AND SUPPORT, BELIEVE IN YOURSELF. AND REMEMBER THAT AT THE END OF THE DAY, WHAT WILL BE WILL BE, AND IF YOU'VE TRIED YOUR BEST THEN THAT'S REALLY ALL THAT MATTERS.

017. This isn't everything

IT'S VERY EASY FOR UNI TO TAKE OVER YOUR ENTIRE LIFE AND WHILST THAT MEANS YOU DO MORE UNI WORK, IT ISN'T VERY GOOD FOR YOUR HEALTH & GENERAL ENJOYMENT OF LIFE. OF COURSE YOU WANT TO GET GOOD GRADES AND GET YOUR DEGREE AND FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS, BUT IT'S IMPORTANT TO REMEMBER THAT THIS ISN'T EVERYTHING. THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN UNI. THERE WAS A TIME BEFORE THIS. THERE WILL BE PLENTY OF TIMES AFTER THIS. LIFE HAS A FUNNY WAY OF WORKING SOMETIMES, AND REALISING UNI ISN'T EVERYTHING CAN HELP YOU TO THINK MORE ALONG THE LINES OF 'WHAT WILL BE WILL BE' & 'EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON' & 'IT'S GOING TO BE OKAY'.

018. Treat yourself

GIVE YOURSELF DAYS/ EVENINGS/ MORNINGS OFF AND JUST HAVE FUN. DO WHATEVER YOUR HEART DESIRES. PUSH EVERYTHING UNI RELATED TO ONE SIDE AND GET OUT THERE AND ENJOY YOURSELF.

019. Time Management

ONE GOOD TIP I LEARNT FROM MY FRIEND IS TO TREAT UNI LIKE A 9-5 JOB, WHERE YOU DO YOUR WORK WITHIN THAT TIME FRAME AND THEN AFTER THAT YOU STOP, SWITCH OFF AND RELAX. OBVIOUSLY SOMETIMES IT DOESN'T QUITE WORK LIKE THAT, AND THERE ARE PERIODS OF TIME WHEN YOU WILL HAVE TO DO SOME 'OVERTIME', BUT IT'S A PRETTY GOOD RULE OF THUMB. ALSO USE SPARE TIME TO PLAN AHEAD & GET AHEAD OF THE GAME, EG. START ON ASSIGNMENTS EARLY, MAKE REVISION RESOURCES, DO NEXT LECTURE'S EXTRA READING. 

020. Positive quotes

IT MIGHT SOUND NAFF, BUT WRITE INSPIRING QUOTES & COMMENTS ON PIECES OF PAPER AND STICK THEM AROUND YOUR ROOM. THE BEST PLACES ARE THE WALL YOU FIRST SEE WHEN YOU WAKE UP & WHEN YOU GO TO BED, AND THE WALL YOU SEE WHEN YOU'RE DOING WORK IN YOUR ROOM.  ALSO STICK UP PICTURES OF THINGS YOU LOVE & WHICH MAKE YOU HAPPY. ALL THESE THINGS REALLY DO HELP YOU TO FEEL MORE POSITIVE, PEACEFUL, ASSURED AND MOTIVATED. TRUST ME.

More Than That

MORE THAN THAT

The other night I got a taxi to the local station, having finished a week spent volunteering at a festival.  I had packed all my things, said goodbyes to all these lovely, lovely people I'd been lucky enough to meet, I was feeling pretty content and at one with the world, and I was looking forward to going home and seeing my family again. The only little niggle playing on my mind, was making sure that I got the taxi to the station in time for me to catch my train. I didn't anticipate anything else to be worried or stressed over. What could possibly go wrong? Over the last five years I have caught numerous taxis without any hassle or bother, and in more recent years I have taken to talking to taxi drivers whilst on the journey, as I consider it to be a polite, friendly and generally nice thing to do. And usually everything is absolutely fine, and it quite often makes the journey more enjoyable for both parties, so you know, nothing wrong with that.

However the other night when I got picked up, as soon as my taxi arrived and I went over to talk to the driver, I could sense something was a little amiss. As I said, normally I have no issue whatsoever with taxi drivers, and I've never had a problem with them, which is why I think I picked up on this particular taxi driver so quickly. Something about the way the way he was looking at me and replying to my questions made me feel a bit uncomfortable, especially as he was easily old enough to be my father. This guy lingered too long, paused for too long. Something just seemed unclear about him. It felt like both of us were approaching this taxi journey from two very different angles: me as a paying customer wanting to get from A to B, him with what felt like some kind of ulterior motive. But I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. So I got in the car, made polite conversation, and away we drove as people waved me off. 

However on the way out of the festival site, we got stuck behind a car that was having problems. Initially that was fine. The taxi driver asked me questions about what I'd been doing at the festival, I asked him about how long into his shift he was. Again, that was totally fine. But I quickly began to notice how he was relaxing against his window and looking over at me with this weird look in his eye. There was something a bit off about the smile, and his whole body language in general. I started to feel uncomfortable in his presence and it was only a couple of minutes into the journey too. After a pause, he asked me how old I was, so I told him reluctantly and I could sense him looking me over with that weird smile, and I didn't like it one bit. I knew this wasn't normal.

Something about the whole situation made my survival instinct quickly kick in. I tried to keep calm and logical whilst my heart was hammering in my chest, my brain was formulating all these questions like a checklist: where's my phone, where's the door handle, is the door locked, how long to the train station, what would Mum say, who could I call, what should I do in case, is this taxi being monitored. What do I do, what do I do? Eventually we got moving again, and I felt it was important that I stay calm and rational. I could just about remember the route from the campsite to the train station, so I kept my eyes peeled on every single turn, just to be safe. For a couple of minutes I relaxed a bit, and stuck to asking carefully selected, neutral questions about boring but safe topics. After a while we stopped talking, but I began to worry about what he might ask next. I don't know why, but I suddenly thought; what if he tried to approach the topic of boyfriends, and literally seconds after, there came the question, and I felt myself freeze in my seat. 

Often when people ask you a question like that, you can tell by a whole host of signs like body language and tone, what they mean by it, and often you sense no hidden meaning. Just natural curiosity. But when a middle aged taxi driver who makes you feel uncomfortable just by looking at you, asks you that question, you know that things really aren't okay. So I considered my response at lightning speed, sensing that I had to be very careful about what I said. Do I lie, do I tell the truth, do I tell him it's none of his business. I didn't want to aggravate the situation or put myself in danger. I just wanted to say as little as possible, keep things as neutral as possible, and make sure I safely made it to the station. So I told the guy curtly I didn't, all the while expecting my tone to give him the hint that I really didn't want to talk about my love life with him. 

And if he'd stopped there, then that would have been just about bearable. But the taxi driver began questioning why an attractive girl like me didn't have a boyfriend, asking if I got up to any fun with guys whilst I was at uni, pushing me to justify why I felt like I didn't need a man, before going on to imply that I was boring and no fun and not living my life properly because I didn't have a boyfriend or go around sleeping with people for fun. By that point I felt really uneasy, as was part of me questioning why I was here justifying my personal life choices to my rather sleazy taxi driver, and essentially being called a prude. I didn't know where he was going with it, and I didn't even want to think about it. All I wanted was to get out the car, but I knew we were very near the station, so I tried to stay calm and keep the situation as neutral as possible. I replied curtly, firmly and vaguely, all the whilst preparing myself to react if anything more happened. 

After that particular bout of questions, the manner of the driver changed. He became sullen, quiet, mardy. I knew that I hadn't replied how he was hoping I would, but it was a relief to know that my answers had been enough to put a stop to it all. When we finally got to the station, I paid the him, thanked him for the lift, and wished him a good night. Obviously that didn't quite reflect how I was feeling inside, but at the same time, to me it felt like an act of defiance, an act of strength, an act of humanity. Something to counteract the negative energy of the situation. Something, just something, to perhaps prick his conscience. In spite of everything, I wanted to be the better person. 

After the taxi had pulled away, I felt so on edge and I guess a bit stunned, shocked, and scared too. My heart wouldn't stop racing, my body felt tense and uneasy. I tried to keep my distance from any man I could see. I don't know why, but all I wanted to do was call up in a ball and cry. I didn't know how to process what had happened. I didn't know what to think, feel, do. I knew I was safe. I knew that in theory nothing had happened. I knew that I had made it to the station. I knew that all I had to do was get on the train and then I'd be home. I knew all these rational, logical things, but it didn't make me feel any better. I needed a hug. Someone to tell me it was all ok. The only thing I could think to do was call my sister and tell her what had happened, partly for the comfort and reassurance of a familiar voice, partly for verification that I hadn't overreacted to the whole situation. I didn't dare call my Mum.

On the train home, I started thinking again about what had happened, once again attempting to process it all and decide what to do next. The whole situation was wrong on so many levels, and I hated how vulnerable and scared and trapped I had felt. I hated how all I had wanted was a lift to the station, not an interrogation of my love life and being forced to reject the inappropriate attention from my taxi driver. I hated how I hadn't given that man a piece of my mind. I hated how I hadn't known what to do. I hated how he thought it was ok to do that in the first place. I hated how outdated and sexist his views were, are. I hated how he made the idea of being a happily independent young woman, something I am very proud to be, seem like a bad thing. I hated thinking that he might do all that to another girl. I hated that I had been subjected to it, simply because by the sheer chances of fate my chromosomes are an XX, not an XY. I have boobs. I have curves. I have a vagina. I have a higher pitched voice. I have feminine features. And even when my hair was a greasy mess and my boots were caked with mud and I was covered from top to toe, this middle aged man still thought he'd give it a go, despite it being completely inappropriate for so many reasons. I was pretty sure that if I had been a 20 year old guy, that taxi drive would have been completely different.

Part of my stress came from wondering if I had just overreacted to the situation, and it got me thinking about how when it comes to being a woman, you really can't win either way. Whatever you do, think, feel, you're going to get a label for it. It gets hard to differentiate how you feel, and how society dictates that you should feel. Am I wrong to have felt afraid? Am I wrong to have reacted so acutely? Am I wrong to have considered this guy's behaviour to be offensive and inappropriate? I know some men I know would say yes to that question. And heck, as a human being irrespective of gender dictations, am I even allowed to feel the way I do? It's all so confusing, and being a woman is still as much of a pain in the arse as it's ever been. 

You can't help but wonder why there's even room for sexism in this modern age. You can't help but wonder about how women are still presented and addressed within society. We're continually being goaded and pushed into an inferior status and position from so many different angles, whether that be consciously or unconsciously, even though we demonstrate our equality, and dare I say it, our superiority, time and time again. Even though we are proving time and time again how strong, intelligent, amazing, fierce, compassionate, skilled we are as a gender. Although being a woman can still be tough, in ways that many men just cannot understand, I still feel so incredibly proud to be one. I refuse to allow my gender to define who I am as a human being. I refuse to be limited by it. I refuse to feel inferior because of it. Why should I? Why should you? 

A while later on the train home, I began thinking about the whole idea of refusal, and how even though it didn't feel like it in the moment, I had a choice. I have a choice. I always have a choice. I get to choose how I respond and process things. I don't have to be afraid. I don't have to be the weaker one. I realised that I could refuse to acknowledge myself as vulnerable or weak, because in reality, I am more than that. Way more than that. I had been clever, I had been strong, I had looked after myself and ensured my safety. I handled the situation calmly and maturely and sensibly, even though I felt the complete opposite on the inside. And thinking about it like that helped me to feel a lot better about everything. I then started thinking about how that taxi driver had no idea how his actions had made me feel. No idea about the repercussions. No idea about how outdated his views towards women are. No idea whatsover. And how wrong that actually was, is.

In those fifteen minutes, that taxi driver wanted to feel superior to me. He saw me objectively. He saw me as my gender, and consequently considered me vulnerable because of it. He didn't see me as a fellow human being. He didn't even consider that there was more to me than merely my appearance. He didn't know that I'm at a top university, half way through a degree and coming out with firsts too. That I know so much information about a wide range of different topics, as do I have opinions, feelings, perspectives, and I could easily have intelligent conversations and debates and hold my own. That I run my own online art store, write a blog, did a radio show, play for a sports team. That I regularly volunteer with stroke survivors, that I volunteered at a camp for disadvantaged kids, that I peer mentor, that I helped raise over £10,000 for charity. That I can paint and draw and write and drive and play the guitar. That myself and a whole host of other amazing women just spent a week heavy lifting and putting together and taking down a festival. That I try to be a good person and see the positives in every situation, every person. That one day I hope to change my corner of the world in some kind of way. That I want to pioneer, advance things, make a difference. He didn't know. He just didn't know. But I did. I knew, I know, that I am more than what he saw me as. And if I know, well then that's all the power I need right there.

Sometimes being a woman feels a bit like being a tiger that has long since outgrown and broken out of its cage and confinement, yet people still try to force you back into it all the same. They don't realise that you're already free, and sometimes you forget it too. They don't realise that it's impossible to go back to what used to be. They can try and force you into that position all they like, but guess what? It's just not going to work. It can't work. It's not happening. End of story. Us women, we're smarter than we realise, stronger than we realise, more kick ass than we realise. We are so. much. more. than the dictations of our bodies, the weights that try to drag us down, the labels we're latched with, the outdated views we're plagued by. I'm more than that. You're more than that. We're more than that. We're not a star in somebody else's universe. We're the bloody universe itself. We stand right there beside our male counterparts, and we do one heck of a marvellous job at holding our own. And the older I get, the more I realise how foolish I am for allowing myself to be tricked into feeling weak, when in fact I have that glorious, gorgeous, intelligent, burgeoning, kick ass, female strength within me all along. And as The Smiths would say, it's a light that never goes out.

Why Camping Is The Best

WHY CAMPING IS THE BEST

Up until last week, I had never ever ever been camping in my whole entire life. Aside from camping out in my best friend's garden for her birthday one time, way back in primary school, and a camping trip in year 7 where we stayed in a bunker, I had never done the whole camping thing. Family holidays were always spent sleeping in some kind of hotel or B&B or caravan or villa or hostel, and usually involved getting as far away from Blighty as possible, hence my whole entire childhood was a camping-free zone. Woo. Some of my friends used to go every summer, and obviously there were those who did camping as part of the good ol' festival ritual, but apart from that, no-one I knew really did it. Mum and Dad never owned a tent or anything camping related, bar a sleeping bag, and they never once said 'come on kids, we're going camping in Wales/ Derbyshire/ Devon/ The Middle of Nowhere!'. So by some miracle, when it came to camping, I guess you could say I had a get out of jail free card.

For most of my life, I considered this to be a very good thing indeed. The thought of camping in a tent, at complete mercy to the liberties of the great outdoors, namely the British weather system, didn't really appeal to me. I was relieved that I'd never had to do it. Never had to stick my feet in the ground and protest, as my parents tried to drag me out into the car whilst trying to convince me that this would absolutely be the best holiday of my whole entire life. Never had to endure being at one with nature. Lucky me. I always thought I wasn't missing out on anything special. I always thought I'd got off scot-free. My brain just couldn't fathom why camping would be anything special,something worth doing and continually doing. What was the point? Why would you willingly subject yourself to camping when you could do a package holiday in Majorca, save up and have a gander in New York City, stay in a hostel on Scarborough coastline? Why would you live in a field, surrounded by cows and sheep and nothingness?

Obviously, as I usually am with most things, I was wrong, as I found out last week twenty years too late when I went camping in my beloved Derbyshire with the charity Derby Kids Camp. My recent first introduction to camping has completely changed my perspective and opinions on the whole matter. I'm not lying here when I say that I have completely, 100% fallen in love with it. Hello number one fan over here. Give me tent poles and canvas and a mallet and I'll be over the moon. Give me a portable loo and I'll be on my way. Give me some wood and a lighter and by George I'll be on it with that bonfire and toasted marshmallows and campfire songs. Stick me in a field in the middle of nowhere and I'll cry with happiness. The camping bug, that nifty little thing I looked down on and opposed for so long, has caught me well and truly. There's just something about camping that has undoubtedly changed me for the better, and now I just want to spend every free moment pitching up in random fields and spending my days and nights immersed in the simple beauty of the world around me.

So with that, I'd love to share with you my top reasons for why I am now considering investing in an 'I <3 CAMPING' t-shirt, in the hopes that it makes you think twice about camping too, and join me in purchasing said t-shirt too.

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MY REASONS:

001. Being able to watch the morning sunrise and sunset over the architecture of the countryside, and marvelling as all the pretty lil colours flood the sky.

002. On a clear night, the whole entire sky is filled with stars, and they all shine so clearly and brightly. It's definitely worth looking like a tit as you walk around everywhere with your had at a -90 degree angle. Oh and you can actually see shooting stars too! 

003. Bonfires in the evening are a lovely way to spend time with people, as are campfire songs a great way to raise spirits. 'Honk honk round and round and crash beep beep' is a personal favourite.

004. NO WIFI OR 3G/4G= NO COMPULSIVELY CHECKING EMAILS OR SOCIAL MEDIA OR CONNECTING WITH THE REAL WORLD= REALISING THAT NONE OF IT MATTERS!!!

005. It's incredibly cathartic and cleansing for the soul. Hello  Miss Revitalisation.

006. You actually communicate with the people around you, and have proper decent and real conversations with facial expressions and everything.

007. You eat three nice, sizeable meals a day, meaning no desire to snack and anyways, camp food in my opinion is super delicious.

008. Every day feels like an adventure.

009. You can literally go anywhere and everywhere. There are no limits. The world is your oyster.

010. You can set up home in the most stunning places of natural beauty and be immersed right within it, instead of just visiting them in passing.

011. Being able to really enjoy and appreciate and live in the moment.

012. Getting back to basics (eg. portaloos, no showers, no washing machine, washing hair over the sink, not having a kitchen, no TV), makes you realise what really matters, as do you appreciate these things a whole lot more.

013. Being at mercy to the elements is actually not so bad, because you already feel somewhat at one with nature. So you realise that things will pass, and even this super heavy rain which you swear is actually a tornado which will blow the whole world into pieces, will pass too. 

014. Dressing up in super cosy clothes and wrapping up super warm before bedtime, then lying there contentedly, snug as a bug.

015. IT'S SO CHEAP AND EASY TO DO. HELLO 365 DAY HOLIDAY.

016. It teaches you a lot about yourself, who you are as a person, what matters to you most and what you want in life.

017. Going on long walks in amazing parts of the countryside and coming back with a relaxed mind and body, and sleeping like a baby come night time.

018. Spending quality time with people, and laughing and bonding lots as you moan about your camping experience, eg. how you fell over in the rain last night as you nipped out for an emergency pee and that time you crouched under the hand dryer to dry your hair.

019. Becoming at one with nature. That means getting over any bug related fears and gaining a new opinion on cows and roosters, especially when they wake you up at 6am in the morning for no apparent reason at all.

020. You live your days to the full (again, mostly thanks to those cows, sheep and roosters)

021. It's actually quite nice to sleep in a tent, even when your tent is the size of a cupboard and everyone else's tent is 10 x bigger complete with double bed and living area, and you have to deflate your airbed so you can even fit inside the tent. 

022. It's also kind of nice, knowing that it's all that separates you from the great outdoors is that tent canvas.

023. When you eventually make your way home, you feel a bit like Bear Grylls, or an evicted contestant from I'm A Celeb, and that first cup of hot tea tastes like God prepared it for you himself.

024. You actually feel like you've been on a holiday, like an actual holiday where you completely leave your everyday life behind and just focus on relaxing your mind and body and enjoying the simple pleasures in life.

025. You do lots of exercise = keeping fit.

026. It's a great time to get out the Adele and Beyonce and practice your singing talents= hello future record contract

027. YOU ACTUALLY GET MORE TANNED THAN WHEN YOU GO ABROAD AND EVERYONE WILL NOTICE. THIS IS A LEGIT FACT.

028. You're completely aloud to slob out and be lazy and sleep and be wined and dined and live in your pjs and have that 10 hour bath complete with Lush bath bomb when you get back, because you survived the elements, you clever clogs you. Best tell Bear Grylls to watch out.