How To Cope With Uni

HOW TO COPE WITH UNI

The other day, I happened to read an article that highlighted how students are more likely to develop depression, anxiety and heightened stress during their time spent at university. Due to numerous pressures including exams, dissertations, assignments, social life, love life, extra curriculars, family, money, -insert anything you could possibly think of in the whole wide world-, the likelihood of experiencing a meltdown akin to an erupting Mount Vesuvius is sky high, and unsurprisingly so too. And I think the worst thing of all, is that you're completely and utterly unprepared for it when it happens. Whether you're coming into uni straight from college, after a gap year, or entering as a mature student, the one thing no-one ever seems to tell you about uni is that it is hard, with a capital H A R and D. You hear about how it will be the best time of your life, how you will make so many friends, how awesome it is moving to a new city, being independent, living in a house, how much fun the societies and nights out and house parties and socials are, how student loan is like a triple kiss from God and how you will go straight into employment with your 1st class honours degree because you're such a clever clogs and all round super crazy amazing person. And yes, all those things are likely to happen and you really will have such a ball, but the degree itself, the one thing people always forget to mention, is often one of the most difficult things you will ever do. And that in turn, means that things are not always hunky dory, and the most important thing to remember is that that is okay.

Now that I've begun my third year of madness, and my poor brain tries to figure out just how I'm going to survive yet another year, and comprehend how I even made it this far in the first place, I thought it would be a good idea to talk about the overall uni experience, warts and all. Share some of my own advice regarding how to cope with it, so that we can all save that Vesuvius eruption for another day. I think one of the most important things to recognise about uni, is that it is very much a mixture of the good, the bad and the ugly. When you first start, particularly if you've moved away from home or you're having to travel to the moon and back just to make it into uni every morning, the first thing you realise is that your life is essentially thrown up in arms. It's like uni blows a whirlwind your way, and suddenly everything you ever knew is up in the air, and it takes a while for it all to settle back down again and for some kind of normality to resume. You need to make friends with all these strangers. You need to figure out how to get around campus. You need to work out how to use your student card and how to even get into the library, let alone take out a book. You need to get used to living in your new home, get used to your new city, get used to not living with the people you love and know best. You need to start looking into those extra curriculars to pimp your CV. You need to learn how lectures work, how to use the online learning platforms, how to write uni standard essays. You need to get your head around referencing, the actual stuff you've come here to learn, and the fact that journals are no longer diaries featuring word vom about all the boys you're crushing on. 

It's a lot to stomach in one go, and even when you finally get the knack of it all, which may be half way through first year, or half way through second year if you're me, it still doesn't really get easier. Just when you find your footing, the content gets harder and the demands placed upon you increase. And alongside that you have grown up problems to deal with too, like shooing out rogue slugs in the downstairs bedroom, berating the local council for sending you a tax bill, stressing if you have enough money to pay your rent, a fridge that thinks it's a freezer, talking to the police about a car that got smashed by burglars the other night, and regretting the alcohol and cheese toastie induced messages you sent at 4 in the morning to that guy you like. And you sometimes find yourself wondering if you should just quit while you're ahead and pursue a career as a toilet paper distributor in a local nightclub instead. You wonder if all this is really worth it at the end of the day. You wonder if this is what you really want. Who needs that naff graduation picture hanging in the downstairs toilet anyway, right? You question if you're actually clever enough for this uni malarky, and if the fact you made it to third year is just sheer luck. You look at everyone else and wonder how they have it so easy, how they haven't exploded yet, how they're managing to maintain their social life and relationships and cracking fashion sense and all round sanity. It's like the uni gods tapped everyone with the magic wand of success and good fortune, but then they got swayed by the £1 pizza deal at Domino's and they forget to send some magic your way too. That's what it can feel like sometimes, but the important thing is that it isn't like that all the time. 

Although university may be hard, and the degree itself will push you to your limit and then some, and you may have the occasional freak out or melt down, and things may not always go your way, all this is just one side of the story. The other side, as it turns out, is actually pretty okay. There's all the fun, wonderful, joyful, special, unforgettable, crazy moments that help make everything feel worthwhile. Motivate you to keep on going. Make you feel happy and proud and content. The obstacles you overcome. The successes you earn. The battles you face. The people you meet. The experiences you collect. The way you move closer to your end goal every single day. There's a reason why people are so eager to go to uni in the first place, and there's a reason why the majority make it out at the other end in one piece, clutching their degree certificate and and happy dancing their way on to the podium.

So until that day comes (which it will), what can we do to make it easier for ourselves? How we can survive the ups and downs, and make it to the end of our degree in one piece? How can we cope with everything? How do we keep the juggling act afloat and in motion? Is it even possible? If I'm being honest, I don't think there's ever a perfect answer to these kinds of questions, and naturally as I've only just begun 3rd year (even though I feel like I've been at uni for a million trillion years), I don't quite have all the answers either. But I have experienced enough to know what works, what doesn't work, what's okay, what's not okay, and how to get through the more trying times and get the most out of the whole uni experience. So I think that's a pretty good start. And if even one of my tips helps you, even just a smidge, then it's so absolutely worth it.

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MY TOP TIPS

001. Laugh
 LAUGH LOTS. LAUGH WHEN YOU MAKE A TIT OF YOURSELF. LAUGH WHEN SOMEONE MAKES A TIT OF THEMSELVES. LAUGH WHEN THINGS GO TITS UP. LAUGH OVER SILLY, WONDERFUL, STUPID THINGS. LAUGH AT FUNNY WORDS. LAUGH WHEN YOU HEAR SOMETHING RIDICULOUS. LAUGHING SOLVES A MULTITUDE OF PROBLEMS.

002. Keep Up

TRY AND DO YOUR NOTES AND ESSENTIAL/ RECOMMENDED READING ON THE SAME DAY AS THE LECTURE (ie. do it as you go along instead of letting it all pile up and subsequently having a cataclysmic meltdown).

003. Talking to non-uni people

REGULARLY TALK TO PEOPLE YOU KNOW WHO AREN'T AT UNI, SUCH AS FAMILY MEMBERS, FRIENDS, PARTNERS ETC. THEY'LL MAKE YOU REALISE THAT THERE'S A WHOLE WORLD OUTSIDE OF UNI, & THAT THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN UNI TOO (basically help you regain your perspective).

004. Talking to uni people

REGULARLY TALK TO PEOPLE WHO AREN'T ON YOUR COURSE. IT WILL MAKE YOU REALISE THAT OTHER PEOPLE HAVE IT TOUGH TOO, AND THAT YOU ARE NOT ALONE. IT ALSO HELPS YOU PUT YOUR OWN PROBLEMS AND STRESSES ASIDE, IF ONLY FOR A LITTLE WHILE.

005. Use the printer

PRINT OFF THINGS FROM LECTURES, INSTEAD OF WRITING EVERY SINGLE THING= SAVES A LOT OF TIME & STRESS

006. Academic Adviser

MAKE REGULAR APPOINTMENTS WITH YOUR ACADEMIC ADVISER. IT HELPS TO KNOW THAT THERE'S SOMEONE THERE YOU CAN TALK TO AND WHO CAN SUPPORT YOU. 

007. Bug Lecturers

EMAIL LECTURERS IF YOU HAVE QUESTIONS, UNCERTAINTIES OR WORRIES THAT ARE BUGGING YOU, EVEN IF YOU THINK THAT DOING SO WILL MAKE YOU LOOK STUPID OR WEAK OR ANNOYING. THEY GET PAID TO HELP YOU & THEY WANT TO HELP YOU & SEE YOU SUCCEED, SO MAKE THE MOST OF THEM.

008. Exercise 

DO EXERCISE, EVEN IF IT'S JUST WALKING TO AND FROM UNI. IT CAN HELP TO COUNTERBALANCE THE MENTAL & EMOTIONAL DEMANDS WITH PHYSICAL DEMANDS, AND NOT ONLY DOES IT HELP PROVIDE A HEALTHY EMOTIONAL OUTLET, IT ALSO HELPS YOU KEEP FIT.

009. Word Vomit

WRITE DOWN ALL THOUGHTS ON YOUR HEAD ONTO A PIECE OF PAPER. EVEN IF IT'S UNINTELLIGIBLE, THE MERE ACT OF WORD VOMITING YOUR THOUGHTS & CLEARING OUT YOUR MIND DOES ABSOLUTE WONDERS.

010. To-do lists

MAKE LOTS OF TO-DO LISTS, THEY'RE VERY USEFUL, EG: WHAT YOU'RE DOING EACH DAY & WHEN, RANDOM ODD BITS YOU NEED TO DO, THINGS YOU NEED TO BUY, ASSIGNMENTS/ ASSESSMENTS/ EXAMS THIS SEMESTER, THINGS YOU NEED TO DO FOR UNI THIS WEEK, UNI WORK YOU WANT TO GET DONE TODAY. IT HELPS FOCUS YOUR ENERGIES IN THE RIGHT PLACES, HELPS YOU PLAN YOUR DAY, HELPS MOTIVATE YOU BECAUSE YOU CAN SEE WHAT YOU'VE ALREADY ACHIEVED, AND IT HELPS YOU KNOW WHEN TO CALL IT QUITS & JUST RELAX.

011. Relax

ALWAYS MAKE SURE YOU SCHEDULE IN RELAXATION TIME EACH DAY, EVEN IF IT'S JUST AN HOUR. AS UNI GETS HARDER, IT'S EASY TO DISREGARD RELAXATION AS BEING A WASTE OF VALUABLE TIME. THIS IS NOT TRUE. IF ANYTHING, RELAXATION BECOMES EVEN MORE CRUCIAL, ESPECIALLY FOR YOUR HEALTH AND WELLBEING. WHEN YOU'RE RELAXING, DO SIMPLE, EASY & FULFILLING ACTIVITIES SUCH AS WATCHING A TV SHOW, BAKING, SLEEPING, SHOPPING, DRAWING, PLAYING MUSIC, SINGING, PHOTOGRAPHY, GOING FOR A WALK. 

012. Deep Breaths

ANY TIME YOU FEEL THE PANIC AND ANXIETY AND FEAR RISE, STOP. TAKE A NICE, LONG, DEEP BREATH. CLOSE YOUR EYES FOR A MOMENT. CLEAR YOUR MIND. FEEL THE AIR FILL YOUR BODY. AND WHEN YOU WAKE UP FROM THE MOMENT, TELL YOURSELF THAT EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OKAY, BECAUSE IT WILL BE. 

013. Keep Up

KEEP UP WITH THE THINGS THAT YOU ENJOY AND THAT MAKE YOU HAPPY, EVEN IF IT'S HARDER TO DO SO- DON'T LET UNI TAKE OVER YOUR LIFE OR GET IN THE WAY. IT WILL HELP YOU TO FEEL FULFILLED AND SANE AND LIKE YOU'RE YOU AGAIN. 

014. Time Out

IF YOU'RE IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIG WORKLOAD AND IT FEELS LIKE YOUR BRAIN AND BODY ARE GIVING UP ON YOU, TAKE A BREAK. STOP WHAT YOU'RE DOING. GO FOR A WALK. GET A DRINK. LISTEN TO SOME MUSIC. TALK TO SOMEONE. MAKE SOME FOOD. GO OUTSIDE. LEAVE IT AND COME BACK TO IT LATER. EITHER WAY, JUST GIVE YOURSELF CHANCE TO BREATHE AND RELAX AND REFOCUS AND RECHARGE THE OL' BATTERIES. IT HONESTLY MAKES SUCH A MASSIVE, NOTICEABLE DIFFERENCE.

015. Think Back (Get Some Perspective)

WHEN EVERYTHING FEELS TOO OVERWHELMING AND ALL CONSUMING, THINK BACK TO TIMES IN YOUR LIFE WHEN THINGS WEREN'T THIS WAY. HAPPY MEMORIES. HAPPY TIMES. GOOD THINGS. THINK BACK TO PREVIOUS DIFFICULTIES YOU FACED, AND REMEMBER HOW YOU OVERCAME THEM. REMEMBER HOW FAR YOU'VE ALREADY COME AND HOW HARD YOU'VE ALREADY WORKED TO GET TO THIS POINT, AND REMIND YOURSELF THAT YOU DESERVE TO BE HERE AND THAT YOU ARE MORE THAN CAPABLE OF PASSING YOU WILL PASS THIS BLOODY DEGREE. THESE TIMES WILL PASS, AND YOU WILL GET THROUGH THEM, AND YOU WILL HAVE YOUR PICTURE WITH THAT STUPID MOTORBOARD AND SCROLL.

016. Don't stress about getting the top grades

TO PASS UNI IS A MIRACLE IN ITSELF, BECAUSE SURPRISE SURPRISE, UNI IS HARD. SO ALL YOU CAN REALLY DO IS JUST TRY YOUR BEST, AND IF YOU PASS, THEN WELL DONE YOU, YOU CLEVER CLOGS. IF YOU GET A HIGH GRADE, WELL LET'S CRACK OPEN THE PROSECCO AND PARTAY, AND IF YOU DON'T PASS, DON'T GIVE UP OR TURN ON YOURSELF. WE ALL HAVE OUR OWN STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES. THE IMPORTANT THING IS THAT YOU TRY AGAIN, TURN THAT WEAKNESS INTO A STRENGTH, SEEK HELP AND SUPPORT, BELIEVE IN YOURSELF. AND REMEMBER THAT AT THE END OF THE DAY, WHAT WILL BE WILL BE, AND IF YOU'VE TRIED YOUR BEST THEN THAT'S REALLY ALL THAT MATTERS.

017. This isn't everything

IT'S VERY EASY FOR UNI TO TAKE OVER YOUR ENTIRE LIFE AND WHILST THAT MEANS YOU DO MORE UNI WORK, IT ISN'T VERY GOOD FOR YOUR HEALTH & GENERAL ENJOYMENT OF LIFE. OF COURSE YOU WANT TO GET GOOD GRADES AND GET YOUR DEGREE AND FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS, BUT IT'S IMPORTANT TO REMEMBER THAT THIS ISN'T EVERYTHING. THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN UNI. THERE WAS A TIME BEFORE THIS. THERE WILL BE PLENTY OF TIMES AFTER THIS. LIFE HAS A FUNNY WAY OF WORKING SOMETIMES, AND REALISING UNI ISN'T EVERYTHING CAN HELP YOU TO THINK MORE ALONG THE LINES OF 'WHAT WILL BE WILL BE' & 'EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON' & 'IT'S GOING TO BE OKAY'.

018. Treat yourself

GIVE YOURSELF DAYS/ EVENINGS/ MORNINGS OFF AND JUST HAVE FUN. DO WHATEVER YOUR HEART DESIRES. PUSH EVERYTHING UNI RELATED TO ONE SIDE AND GET OUT THERE AND ENJOY YOURSELF.

019. Time Management

ONE GOOD TIP I LEARNT FROM MY FRIEND IS TO TREAT UNI LIKE A 9-5 JOB, WHERE YOU DO YOUR WORK WITHIN THAT TIME FRAME AND THEN AFTER THAT YOU STOP, SWITCH OFF AND RELAX. OBVIOUSLY SOMETIMES IT DOESN'T QUITE WORK LIKE THAT, AND THERE ARE PERIODS OF TIME WHEN YOU WILL HAVE TO DO SOME 'OVERTIME', BUT IT'S A PRETTY GOOD RULE OF THUMB. ALSO USE SPARE TIME TO PLAN AHEAD & GET AHEAD OF THE GAME, EG. START ON ASSIGNMENTS EARLY, MAKE REVISION RESOURCES, DO NEXT LECTURE'S EXTRA READING. 

020. Positive quotes

IT MIGHT SOUND NAFF, BUT WRITE INSPIRING QUOTES & COMMENTS ON PIECES OF PAPER AND STICK THEM AROUND YOUR ROOM. THE BEST PLACES ARE THE WALL YOU FIRST SEE WHEN YOU WAKE UP & WHEN YOU GO TO BED, AND THE WALL YOU SEE WHEN YOU'RE DOING WORK IN YOUR ROOM.  ALSO STICK UP PICTURES OF THINGS YOU LOVE & WHICH MAKE YOU HAPPY. ALL THESE THINGS REALLY DO HELP YOU TO FEEL MORE POSITIVE, PEACEFUL, ASSURED AND MOTIVATED. TRUST ME.