Easily Amused

EASILY AMUSED

The other day I was about to eat my banana, when I noticed that the complimentary sticker adorned on it actually looked rather funky. It made me laugh and exclaim about said funkiness. which then caused my dear friend to comment, or more like lament, on how I am easily amused. Naturally I tried to defend myself, but after it got me thinking, firstly, am I really that kind of person, who is so easily amused by everything and anyone, and secondly, and most importantly, is that a good thing, or a bad thing?. People, well mostly British people, generally don't respond well to people who are too upbeat, too positive, too perky, too joyful. It's off-putting. It's weird. And it's just down right annoying. Where's the cynicism? Where are the withering comments and the nice healthy doses of pessimism? Where's the hardened heart and the bitter recollections? All these ingredients need to be thrown into the mix, to create a balance between optimism and pessimism, that is slightly askew to the pessimistic side. In some respects, I suppose that acquiring that slightly uneven balance, where that cynicism and pessimism take the deciding hand, is a resolute marker of ascertaining adulthood status. When you've experienced enough of the world, when you've been sufficiently swayed by the protests of society, when you've transitioned too far into adulthood to ever go back, that's when you acquire these surprisingly negative lenses that change your perspective on life. A world of colour and hope and promise suddenly becomes a monochrome metropolis, rife with realism, reluctance, and unabated wariness. Yet the strange thing is, no-one stops to question this. No-one stops to ask where it all went wrong. People accept, sometimes even welcome this progression into scepticism. And part of me thinks that's really rather sad.

  When you're a child, the world is seen in a largely untarnished, glorified way. Aside from the odd events that crop up here and then, which alert you to the possibility that all may not be what it seems, the world is quite a marvellous place to be. You perceive everything in technicolour, you see the goodness in everyone and everything, you have such glorious hope and unquestionable optimism. You explore, you play, you create, you love, and boundaries are merely something to be broken and overcome. You believe explicitly in the goodness that tomorrow will surely bring. Any trips along the way are brushed off, any wrong doings forgiven. You don't know how to hate, you don't categorise people on superficial things, you value people for who they are as a person. You dream without limits, you swear by such a thing as magic, you take the joy out of everything, you live every day to the utmost fullest and you never look back. All these things, are truly beautiful things. Gifts to cherish. Yet at the time you just don't see them that way. You don't realise that one day, things won't feel like this. The world won't continue to present itself in such a way, nor will you perceive it so. Experience, and the overriding influence of other people, will steadily change all that, as will it change you. Yet the awful thing is you won't even realise it's happening, and a lot of the time you'll find yourself willingly surrendering to it, because childhood suddenly becomes a confine from which to escape and adulthood a tantalising and alluring maze in which to enter.

We willingly surrender our previous virtues, beliefs and perspectives, and replace them with those typically associated with adulthood. We allow those steadfast pillars to be demolished and replaced without pausing to question or fight back. We feel we have to lose our childhood hope, optimism, belief, in order to properly grow up and transition into adulthood. We can't have both. It's one or the other. That's just the way it is. And if by some kind of miracle, you manage not to lose that beautiful childhood outlook on life, and you manage to take it with you, people will only go and label you naive, innocent, foolish, easily amused. You're essentially penalised for choosing to refrain from those clutches of adulthood. Penalised for still choosing to see the good in others, see the good and joy in the world, have hope, be fuelled by possibility and promise, choosing not to discriminate, believing in free thoughts and free speech, forgiving and making up again, ... these 'childish' virtues that seem to always go on the decline once adult status is acquired, and subsequently are very much lacking in society. The virtues that are only rediscovered in sheer amazement and overwhelming joy, when one goes on to have their own child, and is once again exposed to that long lost mindset and perspective all over again. 

Now I'll be the first to hold my hands up and say that for a nineteen year old girl living in modern society,  I'm not wise beyond my years, like many of my peers are. I've still got a lot of growing up and experiencing to do. I didn't grow up before my time, I enjoyed my youth and being silly, carefree, foolish, I never had the desire to play at being adults. There's still things most people have experienced my age, that I am yet to do so, which cause some to think of me as innocent, naive, inexperienced. Likewise, this means my opinions and virtues and beliefs have been shaped slightly differently, maybe because my own experiences differ slightly from everyone else's and they've since lead me to gain different insights, awarded me different perspectives, helped me form slightly different conclusions. Personally, I don't see anything wrong with that, even though people don't always take me seriously. In fact, I actually really like that I see the world in a slightly different way to many others. I feel like it's good for me personally. It's healthy for me.Yet the downside, is that it means people still think I've got an awful lot of growing up and experiencing to do, and are waiting for that elusive day to happen. And although I agree with them, in that yes, there's still things I'm yet to experience, which will in turn solidify my adult status, at the same time, I can't honestly say I have a desire to get on with doing them, because I like where I am and I'd rather continue doing things my own way. I don't want to lose myself, or sacrifice part of myself. After all, following the norm is something I often shy away from doing.

In the mean time, I'm really happy with who I am now. I feel that even though I may be lacking in certain experiences, and my life isn't unnecessarily complicated, nor is it prematurely aged before its time, my own experiences have afforded me a different kind of wisdom and maturity and perspective. I've done my growing up a different kind of way, and by taking my time, stubbornly sticking my heels in the ground and refusing to transition into adulthood without a second glance or pause for thought, I've done what's right for me. I've managed to grow up, learn my lessons, change for the better, mature at my own pace, conquer the world one step at a time, all whilst retaining those thoughts, opinions, virtues, perspectives formed and perfected in childhood. I've carried the most important ones through with me to adulthood, and made sure that I'm still in touch with that youthful part of me. I feel that once you close that door and throw away the key, you lose an important part of yourself in the process, that can never fully be regained again. Being young at heart, retaining that somewhat foolish belief and possibility, taking pure joy out of the simplest things, choosing to see the underlying good and potential in people and believe it's always there, seeing the beauty in the world, having hope and faith... Refusing to be hardened, broken, scarred, changed into someone you don't really know, losing your optimism, your child like wonder and amazement... All these things are, I feel, integral to being truly happy in yourself and with your life. Enjoying every day. Appreciating what you have. Seeing the glass half full. Be a better person. Making the world a better place. Being as happy and content in adulthood, as you were at childhood. Feeling so damn lucky to be alive. You don't need to completely and wholly sacrifice who you were,who you are deep down, because it's the done thing. Because it's what's expected of you. Because it's part of growing up and being an adult. Because society encourages and promotes it. There's always another way of doing things. 

So to answer my previous questions: am I easily amused? Well it would definitely appear so. I try to take the joy out of everything I can, and appreciate every little thing too, and I can't stress to you how much those two small actions changed my life and my mindset for the better. Likewise I'm still resolutely in touch with that youthful part of me, that child like wonder and amazement and outlook, but conversely, I firmly believe that doing so doesn't make me childish or immature. It means I walk without fear, it means I still see the world through the lenses of technicolour, hope, possibility, optimism, potential, it helps me to be a better, kinder, fairer person, it means I'm happy to be alive and that I'm grateful for everything I have, every day of my life, it means my heart is not cold or broken, nor is my soul charred and disillusioned. To put it simply, it means I'm happy. So happy. So to answer the second question: are all these things a good thing or a bad thing? Well I think I know my answer...