The older I get, the more convinced I am that I'm living my days in this strange sense of hope. The hope that tomorrow, next week, next month, next year, next decade, things will be better. Things will be different. That dream existence will be a reality. There will be a time when every single variable in my life will be aligned like the stars in the sky, in perfect harmony. In life, it feels like we're always striving for something more. And defining that 'more' is something we can't put our finger on. It's ambiguous. It's elusive. It's magical and mystical, and maybe that's part of its allure.
Today is okay. Today isn't perfect. Today is just another day. Today is another moment of a life. A snapshot of a period in time. Another morning that you woke up. Another sunrise. Another twenty four hours to fill. And living your days becomes a routine. Waking up is like clocking in, stating your presence in this lifetime. Hello world, I made it through the night and I'm ready to live another day. And all our days blend into one another without much significance. Time blurs and warps and it speeds by like a beam of light. Sometimes it's hard to spot the endings and beginnings.
It continually feels like life is speeding up, faster and faster, and you sense a destination, a conclusion, a reason, but you can never see it. The things we look forward to come and go. We thought they were the moments of significance, but they too pass by in the blink of an eye. And if they aren't the destination, then where is?
Every year of my life, I've believed that next week, next month, next year has the answers. That's when that feeling of expectancy eternally rising in my chest will meet its maker. Things will happen. The pieces of the puzzle will slot together. Things will make sense. I'll find my way. The things I'm waiting for will find me. The magic I'm looking for will stumble across my path. The answers to my questions will appear before me. One day, I will do the things I always said I would. One day I will be braver. Better. Stronger. Wiser. One day I'll learn from my mistakes. One day, I will have things figured out. One day, I will know what I am doing. One day. But today never seems to be that day.
It makes me wonder if this is what being an adult is like. If this is what life turns into, once you leave childhood behind. The magic and wonder of the world is harder to find. You have to look closer, harder, examine every detail, or sometimes create that magic and reason for yourself. Your life becomes this strange existence where the present moment feels more like a way of filling the hours between two existential points in time. You're always wondering what the purpose of it all is. The best days of your life always come to an end, and it's always too soon. And you wake up the next morning hoping that somewhere in your collection of days, another moment of wonder and happiness is waiting to be discovered.
And in the mean time, life goes on. We are weary, hopeful travellers heading forth without a map. And when we sense our path is right, we feel full of purpose, reason, content, happiness, and that glorious feeling of being anchored right where you were always meant to be. And when we sense our path is wrong, or something happens to trip us up, something unexpected and unforeseen, we feel the fear, the uncertainty, the hesitancy, the worry that we think we know everything, but we don't really know anything at all.
And maybe we're so focused on the future, that we forget to see and appreciate the here and now. Today. The days when we wake up, and our loved ones are still here. Our friends are a phone call away. We have a job. A reason to wake up in the morning. A roof over our heads. Health. Security. Food. Water. We're alive. Today is ours. Even though we know that life is precious, and rare, and the mere fact our existence is possible is mind blowing in itself, we still forget. We still overlook these days like they're nothing of importance. We still put things off till another time, another place, comes around. We feel our existence is so deserved, so right, so infinite, that it could surely never come to an end. We've never known anything except what it is like to be alive, and living in this strange old world. We forget how lucky we are to be here. To have this chance at life.
When the world is racing like the speed of light, and we get carried away with it, our feet barely touch the ground. We're continually running a race that will only truly end in a flash, bang, explosion, as the life is extinguished out of us, and we move onto whatever comes after this existence. But by then it's too late. Too late to turn back time and relive the days of your life again. Too late to experience the wonder, glory and happiness of the best days. Too late to revel in the beautiful mediocrity of the average days spent doing the mundane things that keep you afloat, stop you sinking under. The ones you let slip endlessly and infinitely through your fingers without a second glance, without realising that some of the best moments of your life, of this world, were contained somewhere within them.
We're always wishing for something better. For something more. For a future that is somehow more superior to the present we're experiencing now. We believe in that change. That progression. It's so instrumental to our existence and fundamental to our being. I think as humans we're programmed to be like this. It's how we built this world up into something more than it already was. And that's great. The only problem with that way of thinking though, is that you waste your life away. You let precious, wonderful, beautiful things pass you by. You forget to appreciate the very fact that you're even here on this earth to begin with. And hope is so lovely. The way it makes you feel is so addictive, so ethereal, so pleasing. But sometimes I think we need to take a moment to pause. Take a moment to breathe. Take a second to stop and look around you, and realise that the here and now isn't so bad after all. Life isn't so bad. Today is a new day. Today is another chance. Today is just as wonderful as yesterday, and tomorrow, and all the days before and all the days to come. There's something special embedded in every day. Why not start making it your mission to find it?
When the world is racing like the speed of light, and we get carried away with it, our feet barely touch the ground. We're continually running a race that will only truly end in a flash, bang, explosion, as the life is extinguished out of us, and we move onto whatever comes after this existence. But by then it's too late. Too late to turn back time and relive the days of your life again. Too late to experience the wonder, glory and happiness of the best days. Too late to revel in the beautiful mediocrity of the average days spent doing the mundane things that keep you afloat, stop you sinking under. The ones you let slip endlessly and infinitely through your fingers without a second glance, without realising that some of the best moments of your life, of this world, were contained somewhere within them.
We're always wishing for something better. For something more. For a future that is somehow more superior to the present we're experiencing now. We believe in that change. That progression. It's so instrumental to our existence and fundamental to our being. I think as humans we're programmed to be like this. It's how we built this world up into something more than it already was. And that's great. The only problem with that way of thinking though, is that you waste your life away. You let precious, wonderful, beautiful things pass you by. You forget to appreciate the very fact that you're even here on this earth to begin with. And hope is so lovely. The way it makes you feel is so addictive, so ethereal, so pleasing. But sometimes I think we need to take a moment to pause. Take a moment to breathe. Take a second to stop and look around you, and realise that the here and now isn't so bad after all. Life isn't so bad. Today is a new day. Today is another chance. Today is just as wonderful as yesterday, and tomorrow, and all the days before and all the days to come. There's something special embedded in every day. Why not start making it your mission to find it?
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